We are in the final stretch of the Houses of Doom quartet. We're finishing with Umberto Lenzi's House of Witchcraft (1989).
This time Lenzi directed and wrote the screenplay on the story by Gianfranco Clerici and Daniele Stroppa so I don't know who to blame for this lackluster snoozer.
The film begins with the main protagonist Luke running from someone or something with the sound of baying dogs in the background. He comes to a villa and enters it. A sound draws him to the kitchen where a hideous old crone is stirring a cauldron. She beckons him closer before lifting up his own severed head and throwing it in the pot. She cackles and he wakes up in a sweat.
It turns out that Luke had a nervous breakdown and is recuperating in hospital were his widowed sister in law Elsa looks after him. She's a shrink, not that it matters much. We find out that Luke is unhappily married to Martha who is “completely obsessed with the occult”.
Upon his release from the hospital the next day, Martha insists that they give their failing marriage one more shot by going to a villa she has rented. Can you see where this is going? I could.
It is of course the villa from his dream... Original, right?
They meet the blind owner who is living there as well, and he informs them that his niece Sharon will join them soon. Weird arrangement for renting a place if you ask me.
That night Luke sees the crone beating a priest to death in the garden, and he reacts by calling Elsa to come down and help him solve the “mystery”. Elsa does so and brings her teenage daughter Maria along.
Still with me? Okay, so strange things start happening and now and then the crone pops up and murders someone. In between this, Martha either walks around in a trance or then flat out tries to run over Sharon with her car. This is never mentioned again... Other happenings in this vein are sprinkled throughout the movie pretending that it means something, but it never does.
I'll not spoil the ending, but it made no sense. Given the name of the movie I don't think it's much of a spoiler to say there is a witch and she is evil. That's it, that's why lots of people got killed. If there was some other motive I completely missed it. It's evil for the sake of evil.
From a technical point, this is a pretty well made movie. The cinematography is good, and the soundtrack is on par for the late 80's. There is even a nice car stunt that has no relevance to the plot, but it was cool. The actors aren't bad, but the lousy dubbing kind of makes it hard to be sure.
No, it is the story that is the main failure here. The setup is based on having a mystery but they don't really do anything with it, it just solves itself almost by default. They make a lame attempt to show some “investigation” but everyone just makes assumptions and calls it evidence. The rest is loose elements of horror spread around to remind you that you are watching a horror movie. A snake appears, flowers drip blood for some reason, there is a blizzard in a cellar... Okay, the effects are decent, but the over all structure is pointless. I could understand the awful lack of a plot if House of Witchcraft was a gore and nudity filled shocker, but there is barely any blood and only one small scene with mild nudity so that isn't it either. Ultimately it's just boring.
Do I recommend this movie? No, not really. It isn't awful like Sweet House of Horror but it is dull, uninspired and boring, things a horror movie should never be. It's like an unfunny comedy.
Summary of the Houses of Doom:
House of Clocks – Good, worth a watch.
Sweet House of Horror – Awful, never watch.
House of Lost Souls – Good, worth a watch.
House of Witchcraft – Bad, just don't bother.
That's that and all that. Join me again next time and until then, have a great and safe week!
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