Jingle Bells

The year is coming to an end and the Holidays are upon us. In my case I have a lot of things to do, so I have to pull a fast one today.

But this can be a stressful time of year, so I figured you could use a suitable distraction. Here are two Youtube channels that can perhaps relax and lighten your load.

Documentaries:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_IZEFAXi4caDRwPdL_wxQ/videos


Stand-Up:

https://www.youtube.com/user/justforlaughscomedy/videos


There are of course tons of others, but this is a small start. Have yourself a root around if you feel the need.

I have to run, so until next week, let me wish you a happy holiday!

Can a window laugh?

Hello, and welcome back to Eccentric Spheres!

This weeks topic is La casa dalle finestre che ridono, or The House with Laughing Windows (1976) for those of you, like me, who don't speak Italian. A good friend of mine recommended this film a long time ago, but it wasn't until last week that I sat down to watch it.

What we have here is an Italian horror movie quite unlike any other I've seen, and I've seen a lot of them. And I do mean a lot. Names like Dario Argento, Lucio Fulci, Mario Bava and his son Lamberto Bava, Michele Soavi and many others have created an enormous catalog of horror that I've spent a large part of my life enjoying, but The House with Laughing Windows is not by any of these power houses of Italian horror.

No, The House with Laughing Windows is by a man I had never heard of: Pupi Avati. I can honestly say I haven't seen any of his other films as far as I know. But on with the laughing windows.

Here we meet Stefano, a painter who arrives at an isolated town in order to restore a mural of St. Sebastian in the local church. He has been hired by the mayor, since the mayor thinks the mural will help boost the dwindling tourism numbers. He meets an old friend who is working in the town, who tries to warn him about a terrible danger. He also meets a pretty young girl, Francesca, who arrives at the same time to work as a teacher. Then things go wrong and nasty stuff happens. You know, horror things, this isn't a romantic comedy after all. I'm not going to spoil the plot, so I can't go deeper into it.

The House with Laughing Windows is in many ways an unusual horror movie. While it does use many conventional horror tropes, like the town drunk who spills the beans to the main character, it seems to do so with a good understanding of why they work. I didn't really find a single trope out of place here. Many directors lazily toss them in with no care for the overall effect, much to the detriment of their movies. Not so with Pupi Avati and The House with Laughing Windows. The overall atmosphere is excellent, not too heavy but constantly unsettling. There is something about this film that is hard to put your finger on. There's not that much blood and no real nudity nor are there any monsters, so the majority of he run time is filled with talking, but it never gets dull. The pacing is very good and it never hits you over the head with explanations. Most of the mystery is sort of explained, but not all. If you hate that sort of thing, be warned, you really have to pay attention the whole time.

I watched a subtitled version, and to be honest the subtitles were atrocious. I get that it's not easy but it was bad. Like when the mayor has picked up Stefano and his driver suddenly swerves, the mayor yells “Hey, are you asleep at the wheel?” and the driver, Coppola, turns around and very earnestly says, “No, not at all.” Hilarious. But bad subtitling is par for course with horror movies. I still remember trying to watch an Italian horror film (I forget which one) dubbed to french with dutch subtitling. Suffice to say that was impossible.

To sum up, I recommend The House with Laughing Windows if you want a different Italian horror movie. There are no zombies, cannibals, demons or murderers with black leather gloves to be found, but it is all things considered, excellent for what it is.

That's it for me this time. Until we meet again, have a great week!

Karnstein Trilogy

Every once in a while, the specter of Hammer Films returns from the shadows to haunt me.

This time it possessed me to re-watch the Karnstein trilogy. It's been many years since I saw any of them, and to my surprise I found two of them on Youtube of all places.

Anyway, the Karnstein trilogy is loosely based on Sheridan Le Fanu's novel Carmilla (1871-72), which predates Bram Stokers classic Dracula by twenty-six years, making it one of the earliest western vampire stories. At the time it was somewhat scandalous due to its lesbian content, something the films echo to varying degrees.

The Hammer Films trilogy consists of The Vampire Lovers (1970), Lust for aVampire (1971) and Twins of Evil (1971). An interesting point is that the third movie is essentially a prequel, since the clothes are distinctly 18^th century, but in Lust for a Vampire they state that the year is 1830. A part from this fact, the chronology is all over the place. Carmillas birth and death dates vary from movie to movie. Not that it matters in the slightest. These movies don't take themselves too seriously, and neither should you.

Overall, the two first films have very similar plot. Mircalla (Carmilla) Karnstein returns from the grave and insinuates herself into the lives of innocent girls in order to feast on their blood. In the third movie, Twins of Evil, she makes only a brief appearance in order to make the current Count Karnstein a vampire.

The Vampire Lovers is really good. Ingrid Pitt as Carmilla is excellent, as she manages to be both vulnerable and predatory at the same time. Essentially she is a very tragic and rather sympathetic figure since she can't help but fall in love with her victims, yet she can't stop herself from devouring them either. The rest of the cast works well, and the movie although slow paced, never gets dull. This is the best in the trilogy by far.

The second movie, Lust for a Vampire, is the weakest. It's still enjoyable and to be fair it's not badly made at all, but the script is weak and most of the actors sleepwalk through the scenes. Ingrid Pitt refused to reprise her role as Carmilla and the role went to Yutte Stensgaard instead. I can't say whether it was the script or the direction, but she made a rather dull Carmilla compared to Ingrid. This is also the only entry in the series that don't feature the late great Peter Cushing, as his wife was sick during filming. I'd say watch it the once.

Twins of Evil is perhaps the most famous, as it stars twin Playboy Playmates, Mary and Madeleine Collinson. The title is a bit misleading, since only one of the girls is evil. Cushing appears again, but in another role from Lovers. Twins is again well made, but unlike the others it is funny. I have no idea if this was an intentional choice by the film makers, but it is at times pretty hilarious. Absolutely worth watching.

A couple of interesting points should be made about the Karnstein vampires. They can walk around during the day all they like, although they prefer to stay in the shadow. Sunlight does nothing to them whatsoever. They are hurt by crosses, annoyed by garlic, and fire is useless. To kill them, you have to stake their hearts and/or behead them. Also, they have to return to their graves but unlike Dracula, it seems they can't take their coffins with them.

A side note on staking: As in all Hammer (and many other) movies, the heart seems to be located somewhere in the abdomen, since that's where the stakes inevitably and up.

I could go on with a more in depth analysis of each movie, but it's better if you watch them yourself. I like them, and if you fancy Gothic Horror, you might too.

Until next time, have a vampire-free week!

Far Harbor

Sometimes life takes a strange turn. I waited a year and a half, with baited breath, for the release of Dishonored 2, an yet Fallout 4 refuses to let go. This is made much worse due to Steam having an extra Autumn sale and allowing me to get my Lovecraft-loving claws on the Fallout 4 DLC, Far Harbor, on the cheap.

So since that's what been playing, that's what I'll be talking about. I have previously bought the all build DLC, except the robot workshop, that add extra stuff for you to putter around with in your bases, and they are a lot of fun. I can say this even though I have essentially only scratched the surface. If you're not a builder, they don't add much, but Far Harbor does.

Far Harbor is an island infested with radioactive fog and nasty terrors from the sea that happily walk on land just to eat you. It's a bit like taking Lovecraft's Innsmouth setting, adding a dash of Stephen King's The Mist, and serving it with a healthy dose of Fallout. In other words, it's great!

Content wise, apart from the large explorable map and the intriguing story, it adds lots of new weapons and clothes, though unfortunately no new pistols. Two excellent rifles, the wonderful Harpoon Gun heavy weapon and some really cool melee weapons round out the arsenal. New creatures, new everything really. Well, perhaps not everything, but it's a hefty DLC worth it's price without question.

If you like Fallout 4, you should definitely get Far Harbor at some point. I can't imagine why you wouldn't.

I got a lot to do today, so I'll see you next time. Until then, have a great week!

Bloody hell...

Some time ago I wrote about a couple of older crime movies that I had been watching. Well, I decided to again return to the shadowy halls of cinema history and watch:

The Bloody Pit of Horror (1965).

Some are of the opinion that it's a classic film that horror connoisseurs should watch, but my question is, why? It's terrible and I have a very good tolerance for terrible horror films.

Sure it shows it's age, but that's no excuse. Roger Corman's The Tomb of Ligeia and Masque of the Red Death are both from 1964 and they are awesome. Campy as hell, but in my opinion, very good. So the Bloody Pit can't hide behind age as an excuse.

The fact is that the acting is either non existent or completely over the top. The props are cheap and incredibly poorly made. The story is fine as it goes, but certainly nothing original. Of course it didn't help my viewing experience that the dubbing was atrocious. (The original language is Italian).

The biggest sin is the writing. If you and your friends are in mortal danger and a couple have been killed, why would you grab a member of your group who has no idea of what's going and repeatedly say “There's no time to explain” while leading her away? “What's going on?” and “There's no time to explain” repeats back and forth several times. Just say, “we're in danger, so and so is dead, we have to leave now.” is this so hard?

Bottom line: The Bloody Pit of Horror is in my opinion worth skipping. If you're going for some kind of completionist record, fine, otherwise skip it.

The one interesting bit is the only famous actor; Mickey Hargitay. In the bloody pit, he plays the villain, and seems to be the only one who really tries. But that's not the interesting part.

He was Mr. Universe in 1955 and his second wife was none other than Jayne Mansfield. One of their children is Mariska Hargitay, most famous for her role as Olivia Benson in Law&Order: Special Victims Unit.

His final screen appearance was on Law&Order: SVU with his daughter in 2003 before dying in 2006 at the age of 80.

In 1980 a TV movie, The Jayne Mansfield story was produced with fellow Mr. Universe alumni Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mickey.

Funny world we live in...

That's me until next time, so have a great week!

That was short

Shorter entry today since I'm pressed for time.

Originally it was my plan to review Dishonored 2 today, but I haven't played far enough in order to be properly critical.

I'm 17 hours into my first playthrough with Emily Kaldwin, and I'll just say this: I love it. I'll get back to the subject when I'm done with her story, probably next week.

Instead I have a really funny short film for you. It's about seven minutes long and narrated by Nick Offerman (Parks&Rec, Fargo etc).

I should warn you that it's strictly speaking not safe for work, so don't let your boss catch you watching this.

Direct link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXfltmzRG-g

That's me for now, so until next time, have a great week! 

Did you know?

Winter has struck and seized the land in it's icy grasp. Since I'm not the type to enjoy winter sports, I thought I'd enjoy some interesting facts instead. And since it's Monday I can share them with you. Enjoy!

The most expensive comic book ever sold is Action Comics Issue 1. This is the first appearance of Superman and it was sold at an eye watering 3.2 million dollars. The first appearance of Spiderman only went for 1.1 millions and Batman's premier clocks in at $1,075,000. Super prices for superheroes.

Speaking of money, the richest drug king on record was Pablo Escobar, who at the height of his power had an estimated net worth of $30 billion. He controlled 80% of the global cocaine trade and had to spend thousands of dollars a month on rubber bands to sort his money. He also lost hundreds of thousands to mold, moisture and rodents, due to his inability to properly store his mountain of cash.

Cosmonaut Sergei Krikalev went up to the MIR station a Soviet citizen but came down a Russian. The Soviet union disappeared during the 313 days he was up in space.

In the UK, the British Film Board or BBFC has to rate movies before they can be released. If you make a movie you have to pay the BBFC to rate it or you can never release it. A man called Charles Lyne kickstarted a movie in protest of the BBFC's censorship powers. He raised £5,963 and sent in a ten hour film of paint drying on a wall. The kicker? The BBFC had to sit through every grueling hour of it.

Famous actor James “Jimmy” Stewart (1908-1997) was not only a Hollywood star but also a USAF reserve Brigadier General. He had a whole lot of stars.

Australia has a great many dangerous animals. Sharks, spiders, snakes, venomous octopuses etc. but the most dangerous animals in Australia are as follows: horses, cows, dogs, kangaroos, and bees.

One of the reasons the Beatles stopped touring was that the enormous crowds screamed louder than the loudspeakers. No one could actually hear them play.

Stress uses the same part of the brain as memory, which is why people with stress perform worse. Which leads to more stress.

The athletic brands Adidas and Puma were founded by two brothers who had a falling out and became competitors.

Birmingham, UK has more canals than Venice, but I doubt they are as romantic...

That's it for me and my odd facts for this time. Until next we meet, have a fun and interesting week!